Does anyone else think that former “Pary of Five” actor Jeremy London’s story about being kidnapped and forced to drink and smoke crack is the biggest load of crap of all time? Despite huge holes and just plain ridiculous claims, London is sticking to his story - and riding the wave of new attention from the press. Radar Online is reporting that his bizarre tale has earned London a spot on the next season of VH1’s “Celebrity Rehab” - and a $40K payday.

Mallrats star Jeremy London, who was involved in a bizarre kidnapping where he was allegedly forced to smoke drugs, is checking into Celebrity Rehab, RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.

The 37-year-old has been the subject of sensational headlines since the incident on June 10. He claimed three men held him for hours, drove him around town, made him buy and give out beer and forced him to smoke drugs. RadarOnline.com reported exclusively that the same night he repeatedly and bizarrely tried to climb a tree at a hotel, abandoned his beat-up Land Rover and later tried to slap both his mother and twin brother with a restraining order, but it was denied.

London has a history of drug problems. In September 2009, he entered a rehab center for his addiction to prescription drugs. At the time of his bizarre alleged kidnapping, London was being randomly drug tested after losing custody of his son. His wife is Melissa is also being randomly drug tested.

But in March of this year, he insisted that he was sober. Now it appears that he’s fallen off the wagon and is ready to get some help from Dr. Drew Pinsky.

RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively that London will be checking into the Pasadena Recovery Center on either Sunday or Monday. A source close to London confirms, London’s wife will be taking Jeremy to the center and will visit him periodically. Melissa has been to rehab twice.

The two have a rocky marriage and have lost custody of their 3-year-old son, Lyrik. Jeremy was living in a rented house with Melissa, until recently when he was kicked out by her landlord.

RadarOnline.com has also learned that London will be paid $40,000 for his TV rehab experience.

Although London starred in Party of Five and 7th Heaven, he has fallen on hard times and the Celebrity Rehab payday will certainly come in handy.

London joins Tila Tequila, Jason Wheeler, Jason “Gummi Bear” Davis, Playboy Playmate Shauna Sand for Celebrity Rehab 4.

[From RadarOnline]

I’m conflicted. On the one hand, I’m kind of looking forward to Dr. Drew calling London out on his BS story on national television. Dr. Drew may be a douchey famewhore but he doesn’t suffer fools -or bad liars - gladly. On the other, offering an addict 40 grand and a change to be on TV isn’t the best motivation for him to clean up his act. How about if London cleans up privately and focuses on getting custody of his son back?

Oh, and I just had to share this ridiculous interview London did with People, in which he claims that his “acting skills” kept him alive.

Jeremy London’s alleged abduction by three armed men who then forced him to do drugs seems like a crazy story – and the former Party of Five star knows it.

“If I heard someone saying this, I would probably doubt it as well,” London, 37, tells PEOPLE in an exclusive interview.

But he insists it happened, and shares how he survived. “I was acting my way through the whole thing, telling myself, ‘Just play like you are one of them,’ ” he says.

As London tells it, on June 10 several men helped change his flat tire in Palm Springs, Calif., when they pulled a gun on him, drove him around for 12 hours while making him take ecstasy and smoke meth – then stole his car. A 26-year-old man has been arrested in the case.

At the time, London was in Palm Springs visiting his estranged wife, Melissa Cunningham, 39, and the couple’s 3-year-old son, Lyrik. As part of his fight to regain partial custody of Lyrik, the actor – a recovering addict – says he’s been sober since last September and has been undergoing regular urine tests.

“I haven’t tested dirty ever,” he says.

But London’s family members doubt his story. “After hearing Jeremy’s account of his alleged ordeal, it only brings up a million more questions about what really happened,” his twin brother Jason tells PEOPLE.

[From People]

This reminded me of that movie “Team America: World Police” (you know, the one with the puppets?). There’s a character named Gary who is a stage actor that is trained to be a CIA agent. He uses his “acting skills” to infiltrate a terrorist organization…with hilarious results. “Great acting skills, Gary!”

I’m making a prediction right now that we will see a tearful confession by Jeremy London on a major news show by the end of the summer in which he admits he faked the entire story. Who’s with me?

Jeremy on Dec. 3, 2009. Credit: WENN.

When I look at “Real Housewives of NY” reality star Bethenny Frankel, the words “maternal instinct” don’t necessarily come to mind. But Frankel gave an interview to People magazine saying that she is all about her new baby girl. She also revealed that her own childhood wasn’t so great, and her mom wasn’t much of a role model - which kind of explains a lot.

As a first-time mom, Bethenny Frankel is happily focused on pampering her new baby, 8-week-old Bryn. But the reality TV star says her own childhood was far less loving.

“I never had a true childhood,” Frankel, 39 – the only child of legendary horse trainer Bobby Frankel and his first wife, Bernadette – tells PEOPLE in this week’s cover story. “There was a lot of destruction: alcohol abuse, eating disorders and violent fights.”

The Real Housewives star – whose new Bravo reality series, Bethenny Getting Married? chronicles her whirlwind romance with businessman Jason Hoppy and the birth of Bryn – says she has long been estranged from her mom, whom she describes as “extremely volatile. She was never a mother to me.”

Now, Frankel says she is grateful for the chance to create a stable home with Hoppy and their daughter: “I live for this baby.”

[From People]

Here’s hoping that Bethenny stays focused on her daughter even after the newness wears off. When someone is as self-absorbed as she appears to be, putting an infant’s needs first can get old pretty quickly. But it sounds like she is determined to give little Bryn a better life than she had, and that’s always a good start.

People cover courtesy of Coverawards.

This last season of “American Idol” was mostly a snoozefest and the show’s declining ratings reflected that. But the slide in interest is going beyond the TV show and extending to the once-popular tour. Once the show is over and a winner has been crowned, teeny-boppers usually line up eagerly to see their favorite Top 10 Idol performers live on tour. But not this year - sources are reporting that ticket sales for the “Idol” tour are selling so poorly, several dates have been canceled.

This past season of “American Idol” is widely regarded as one of the show’s worst, and the corresponding Idol Live! tour might be the last nail in season nine’s coffin.

The tour, which features the final 10 contestants, has suffered poor ticket sales (example: at press time, Wednesday’s show at Jones Beach, right outside New York, featured front-row seats still available for just $13). Seven shows have been cancelled, and nine shows have been rescheduled.

Is there an explanation for the lack of interest, or worry on the part of the “Idol” brass? Reps for “Idol” won’t say, other than to comment, “At this time, other than confirming that some shows on the IDOL LIVE! 2010 tour itinerary have been moved and/or canceled, we are not issuing any comment or statement.”

A source close to the production had a little bit more to say about the sad state of the Idol Live tour.

“No one was very optimistic about the success of the Idols tour this summer,” said one well-placed “Idol” source. “They knew they didn’t have big stars on their hands, and really, ‘American Idol’s’ focus isn’t about creating a successful tour, it’s about creating a successful show, week to week. But unfortunately, the tour (not doing well) reflects badly on the show, especially since there’s the ‘who will replace Simon’ situation to contend with this year.”

A tepid tour won’t halt progress, though. “American Idol” begins auditioning for new hopefuls, as scheduled, July 17 in Nashville, Tenn.

[From MSNBC]

Meanwhile, both Lee DeWyze and runner-up Crystal Bowersox are selling an underwhelming amount of singles. DeWyze’s first single as the winner of “American Idol” was a cover of the U2 anthem “Beautiful Day.” Apparently, even the people who voted for the former paint salesman thought that was a bad move, because it’s the worst selling single from a newly-crowned Idol in the history of the show- it spent one week in the Top 10 and then dropped off, selling 25% fewer units than the Kara DioGuardi-written single for last year’s winner, Kris Allen. So, it’s no surprise that the tour isn’t doing well. If people aren’t motivated to support the winner of the competition, why would they pay to see the kids who didn’t win?

A former mistress of John F. Kennedy Jr. must need cash, because she’s blabbing to the National Enquirer about their years-long passionate affair. She’s also writing a tell-all memoir about their relationship. While the details are totally juicy, at the end of day, the guy and his wife have been dead ten years. Do we need to know this? No, of course not. But it still makes for a good read.

More than a decade after the tragic death of John F. Kennedy Jr., his secret mistress is ripping the lid off their passionate love affair - and revealing for the first time how the Prince of Camelot cheated on his wife Carolyn!

“John told me he was considering divorce and was seeing a marriage counselor,” beautiful blond Sybill Hill, now 44, told the Enquirer in a bombshell world-exclusive interview.

“He said he felt guilty for what he had done. We both knew it was wrong, but we couldn’t help ourselves.”

The love story between Sybill and the married son of President John F. Kennedy started in 1991 - and lasted until he perished in the July 16, 1999 plane crash that also claimed the lives of his wife and her sister Lauren Bessette.

The Enquirer first identified Sybill as the woman John cheated with during his failing marriage in our Jan. 18, 2000 issue.

At the time, Sybill - a single mom and a successful artist in Aspen, Colo. - would only tell the Enquirer: “John was very unhappy in his marriage.”

But now she confirms that she was the woman John turned to for comfort as his marriage crumbled. And in an amazingly candid interview, Sybill tells the Enquirer how a chance meeting in Manhattan led to years of secret dates and sizzling sex.

“I met John Kennedy on Jan. 6, 1991, at the Moondance Diner on 6th Avenue,” she recalled.

“I walked in with a boyfriend when a gorgeous-looking man in a baseball cap pointed out a vacant table. I remember thinking ‘He looks just like John Kennedy Jr.!’ We were across the restaurant but we couldn’t stop staring at each other.

“When my date went to the bathroom, I went up to him and we chatted. Before my date came back, John wrote something on a piece of paper and handed it to me. He blushed when the waitress told him, ‘That’s your check, I need that.’ He found another piece of paper, wrote ‘John’ on it and a phone number.”

A week later, Sybill, a willowy look-a-like for Kennedy’s wife - called him.

…”He tried to take me to out-of-the-way places for our dates, but once we went to a club in Harlem where everyone wanted to buy him a drink and take a picture with him.”

Sybill even met John’s fiercely protective big sister, Caroline.

“John invited me to join him at a restaurant for a family dinner for his cousin Bobby Shriver,” recalled Sybill, who is writing a book titled “White Horses” that will include details about the couple’s love affair.

“I sat next to Caroline, but she wasn’t very friendly, giving me a very cold look. It was obvious she was wondering if this girl was good enough for her little brother.”

After a month of dating, the two went to bed together for the first time.

“The sex was breathtakingly wonderful,” Sybill recalled. “But I was surprised that John didn’t seem used to the kind of wild sex that I enjoyed. He loved that about me. He’d say, ‘You’re so uninhibited, so adventurous.’”

“I remember the first time I woke up in his bed, looking at photographs of his parents, President Kennedy and his wife Jackie. It was so surreal.

“John liked to paint, and our painting sessions often turned into sex sessions. Once, I was pleasuring him as he did a finger painting. I still have the painting.

Sybill also reveals that Kennedy never used protection during sex.

“That was fine with me,” she divulged. “I would have loved to have had John’s baby. But it never happened.”

…After the news broke that he was considering marrying Carolyn Bessette, a publicist for Calvin Klein, Kennedy dropped by to see her, Sybill said.

“We made love, but I could see he was conflicted. I put my hand over John’s heart and said, ‘You have to follow your heart.’ He dropped his head and said simply, ‘I’m sorry.’ I knew he was leaving me for Carolyn,” she said.

Devastated by Kennedy’s marriage, Sybill moved to Colorado, but the two stayed in touch.

“I’d phone John’s office and he’d take my call,” she said. “I sent him a note congratulating him on his magazine ‘George’ and telling him I was managing a boutique in Aspen called Manrico Cashmere.”

Sybill began hearing rumors that the Kennedy marriage was in trouble, but but says she didn’t believe them until Kennedy called her at work and said he’d be in Aspen in February 1998.

“John told me, ‘I’m coming to a bachelor party at the Caribou Club and I have to see you,” she recalled.

The Enquirer confirmed with employees at the Caribou Club that Kennedy was there in early Februrary 1998 for a bachelor party. Aspen Club employees also confirmed that had a massage in early February and told a masseuse he was in town without his wife.

On Feb. 7, the night of the bachelor party, Kennedy called and asked her to pick him up, Sybill said.

“He was sneaking out of the party early,” she recalled. “At 9:30 p.m., I picked him up in an alley next to the club.”

Her then-boyfriend was in Tahiti, and she was staying in his two-story rustic home looking after his dog, so she took John there, Sybill said.

“I lit a fire in the fireplace. We started out on the couch, then moved down to an Oriental rug on the floor, and ended up upstairs in the bedroom,” she recalled. “I teased him, ‘Are you like a sailor with a girl in every port?’ John gazed into my eyes and said, ‘No, Sybill, you’re the only one.’”

“But he obviously felt guilty. He told me about his problems with Carolyn and said they’d been seeing a marriage counselor. He said he was considering divorce but still wanted to save the marriage. But then he startled me by asking, ‘What do you think you’ll be doing in two years?’ I took it to mean that he might be free in two years and was asking if I’d still be available. I told him, ‘I’ve never stopped loving you, and I’ll love you forever.’

“He begged me not to tell anyone about our night, saying, ‘Don’t even tell your twin sister.’ At 3 a.m., I drove him back to his rental car outside the Caribou Club. As he drove away, he gave me the peace sign. It was the last time I ever saw him.”

[From The National Enquirer print version, July 12, 2010]

I don’t find any of this to be all that shocking. The name “Kennedy” is pretty much synonymous with “man who cheats on his wife” at this point, isn’t it? John Jr. grew up in a family where the husbands all had something on the side. I guess what’s really surprising is that it was only one woman, and not a half dozen or so. I just don’t understand why this woman felt the need to spill a story that’s over a decade old- and there is no way for anyone to refute her claims because John and his wife are dead. It seems like a lame, fame-whorish move to me.

Header: Archive photo of JFK Jr. courtesy of WENN.

Katie Holmes is still trying to pass herself off as a “triple threat” - the old-school Hollywood term for someone who acts, sings and dances. We’ve seen her attempt this at the Tony awards, “So You Think You Can Dance” and a certain awesomely bad viral video with…lackluster results. But that’s not stopping Mrs. Tom Cruise. She’s using her connections to get herself a part on the hottest musical on television: Glee.

Katie Holmes is looking to boost her sagging career with a role on the hit show “Glee.”

The former “Dawson’s Creek” cutie is negotiating with producers to guest star in a five-part storyline on FOX’s red-hot musical comedy satire, The Enquirer has learned.

“Katie’s film career has stalled, and she desperately needs a career boost. She’s hoping a stint on ‘Glee’ will jump-start her standing in Hollywood,” an insider told The Enquirer.

“She’s been taking dancing lessons from choreographer Tyce Diorio three times a week and she recently hired a private singing coach.”

The 31-year-old actress and wife of Tom Cruise are big fans of “Glee” and classic movie musicals. Last year, Katie performed a rendition of the Judy Garland classic “Get Happy” during an episode of “So You Think You Can Dance.”

To sell herself for a role, Katie arranged an introduction to the show’s creator Ryan Murphy through her friend Dianna Agron - who plays ice-queen cheerleader Quinn Fabray on the show.

“Katie is finalizing a deal to join the cast for a limited story line next season,” said the source. “Tom loves Glee, too, and Katie’s invited Dianna over for impromptu sing-a-longs and dance sessions at their home in Beverly Hills.”

[From The National Enquirer print version, July 12, 2010]

Thanks, Enquirer. Now I will have the image of Tom Cruise whipping out the “jazz hands,” in his specially made dance shoes with lifts inside, all day! Why does the Cruise home always sound like Gay Central to me? I should really stop being so darn judgmental. My family watches Glee, although my husband is a lot less enthusiastic about it than me and my daughters. However, there are no “impromptu” family sing and dance-a-thons going on. Of course, I also wonder how impromptu these sessions are at Casa Cruise when Katie is lobbying for a role, right? Funny how she suddenly became BFFs with a Glee cast member and BAM! She’s on the show. But that’s how Hollywood works. I just hope Katie’s crappy acting and unintentionally hilarious singing don’t make it too unbearable for five whole episodes!

Tori Spelling’s husband, Dean McDermott, is in the intensive care unit after a nasty spill off a dirt bike. Viewers of the couple’s reality show know that Dean’s growing enthusiasm (obsession?) with dirt biking has been a source of strife for the couple lately, and that Dean has already had one previous accident. Sources say McDermott will be ok.

Tori Spelling’s husband Dean McDermott is in an intensive care unit after a dirt bike accident.

The reality star, 43, has been hospitalized with a punctured, collapsed lung, ET confirms. He is expected to stay in ICU for a few more days, but is said to make a full recovery.

Earlier this year, McDermott was in a motorcycle accident in which he fractured his shoulder.

[From MSNBC]

As a wife, here’s how I would react: first, I’d freak out. Then, once I found out my husband was ok, I’d kick his ass for being a 43-year-old guy playing on dirtbikes and wrecking himself. Seriously, does this whole dirtbike thing reek of midlife crisis or what? I guess it’s better than chasing 20-year-olds. Anyway, I hope Dean is okay and I’m sure we will be seeing an entire episode of “Tori & Dean” dedicated to this very soon.

Paul Reubens, a.k.a. Pee Wee “I know you are, but what am I?” Herman, isn’t playing small potatoes with his comeback attempt. His Pee Wee Herman stage show has been selling out in Los Angeles for months, and with all this 80’s nostalgia, the time couldn’t be better for Pee Wee to return to the big screen. Sources report that Pee Wee’s big comeback film will be helmed by “Knocked Up” and “40 Year Old Virgin” mastermind Judd Apatow.

Look who’s joining Pee-wee Herman in the playhouse!

Bromance expert Judd Apatow has teamed up with Paul Reubens to develop a new Pee-wee film for the big screen, Daily Variety reports.

“Let’s face it, the world needs more Pee-wee Herman,” Apatow told the trade. “I am so excited to be working with Paul Reubens—who is an extraordinary and groundbreaking actor and writer. It’s so great to watch him return with such relevance.”

The venerable filmmaker says that he got the idea after taking in Reubens’ sold-out live show in L.A. earlier this year. The Pee-wee Herman Show is headed to Broadway in October.

And Reubens is apparently just as honored to be working with Apatow.

“There is no one like Judd in our business—he loves comedy with emotion and heart, and he sees what we do as art,” said the resurgent 57-year-old actor. “I can’t believe I’m getting this opportunity to be working with him.”

Reubens is working on the script with writer-actor Paul Rust. Apatow’s going to produce, not direct and produce, but that didn’t seem to hurt Superbad, Pineapple Express or Get Him to the Greek.

Besides, Pee-wee is technically a for-all-ages character, so they’re going to want to avoid the automatic “R” that Apatow’s films usually get.

[From E!]

I am so excited about this movie. I always thought Pee Wee/Paul got the big shaft (no pun intended..ok, pun intended!) regarding that whole “masturbating in a porn movie theater” thing. I mean, isn’t that what people do in those places? Compare his trangression to what people get away with these days, and you realize he wasn’t hurting anyone. But I digress. Pee Wee! Apatow! Movie! I just hope that Jambi, Miss Yvonne, and Chairy are along for the ride. I’ve missed them so much!

Photos are from 1/20/10 and feature Miss Yvonne, The King of Cartoons and Cowboy Curtis. Credit: WENN.com

There’s a rumor in the Chris Brown abuse case is that his victim/girlfriend Rihanna is refusing to cooperate further with Los Angeles prosecutors. But it’s not for the reason you might expect. At first, the story was that Rihanna didn’t want to further incriminate Brown- but now, those close to the singer say that she doesn’t trust the prosecutors in the case to keep her testimony and other details of the incident from the media.

The word over the weekend from Los Angeles is that star singer Rihanna is not cooperating with prosecutors in the Chris Brown case.

Sources say Rihanna “wants the whole thing” to go away and isn’t helping the district attorney prepare his case against Brown for allegedly beating her to a pulp in the early hours of February 8th, the day the of the Grammy Awards.

Apparently Rihanna is angry, they say, that pictures of her bruises were leaked to the press. She’s not happy, too, that she was quickly identified as Brown’s victim.

[From Fox News]

Rihanna has every right to be upset about that photo being leaked. There certainly doesn’t seem to be much control over the information pertaining to this case, and I doubt that will change if there’s a trial. This was a very personal ordeal for her, and to have to go through it under this kind of media scrutiny must be a nightmare. It’s the court and the police’s job to protect the victim - and in this case, it hasn’t happened. Still, so many people are looking to Rihanna to stand up for herself - by having her day in court, if it gets that far, to tell her side of the story. She shouldn’t give up that chance, even if it means the world will hear what happened.

Note by Celebitchy: According to a rep from the L.A. County DA’s office quoted by TMZ, Rihanna is cooperating with investigators and they “deal with her attorney who says she is a cooperating victim.”

Rihanna is shown out on 3/26/09. Credit: Fame Pictures

A couple of weeks ago we told you about a brewing battle between “Hell’s Kitchen” star Gordon Ramsay and his former teacher and nemesis, Marco-Pierre White. White was given his own cooking competition reality show on NBC - clearly a knock-off of Ramsay’s show. Well, it looks like viewers only have room for one grouchy British chef in their hearts- and on their TiVOs. White’s show, “Chopping Block,” was canceled after only three episodes. As Chef Ramsay would say, “GET OUT!!”

NBC is pulling cooking competition series “Chopping Block” from primetime after three weeks, sources say.

The network informed affiliates tonight the reality series starring renowned chef Marco Pierre White will be removed from Wednesday’s lineup.

NBC is fortunate to have Jay Leno’s 10 p.m. talk show in the fall considering how many slots are getting cleared out this season. Including “Chopping Block,” six series are not returning — “Knight Rider,” “My Own Worst Enemy,” “Crusoe,” “Lipstick Jungle” and “ER.” A couple midseason reality shows, “Superstars of Dance” and “Momma’s Boys,” are likely gone. Four others are looking pale and shaky — “Friday Night Lights,” “Kath & Kim,” “Life” and “Kings.”

“Block” will be replaced with repeats of “Law & Order: Criminal Intent” (not to be confused with the upcoming “CI” episodes that first aired on USA Network which will make their broadcast debut starting April 29. Until then, these are repeats of the “CI” episodes that aired on NBC last year — repeats of repeats, in other words).

The cooking competition debuted modestly on March 12, then fell in the ratings with each episode. Sources say NBC plans to run air the remaining episodes at some point. “Block” is survived on Wednesday nights by crime dramas “Life” and “Law & Order.”

[From The Live Feed]

You know your show sucks when NBC thinks old reruns of “Law and Order” will get better ratings. I wonder if Ramsay finally feels vindicated now that he’s more of a commercial success than his old mentor? Supposedly, White once made Ramsay cry when he was a young culinary student. Looks like Ramsay learned everything he knew from White - and then some.

Here’s Marco-Pierre White in London on November 6th. Images thanks to Newscom.

If you’re looking for a good deal on some TV memorabilia, former “Eight is Enough” and “Charles in Charge” star Willie Aames might be able to help you out. The cash-strapped actor is holding a garage sale in order to save his foreclosed house. I hope Lindsay Lohan is paying attention to this story - this could be her someday soon!

Eight apparently wasn’t enough for Willie Aames.

The star of Charles in Charge and Eight Is Enough, after filing for bankruptcy last year and whose house is in foreclosure, has been reduced to holding a garage sale at his Olathe, Kan., home to raise some scratch.

Among the items on sale Thursday were antiques, artwork, a piano, leather couches, a TV set, a mounted lion’s head and other stuffed wildlife the 48-year-old had hunted, and movie memorabilia. Aames also signed autographs while and a film crew recorded the event for a TV documentary about his life, reports the Kansas City Star.

After his stints on TV and a self-admitted addiction to cocaine, the former child actor became religious and visited schools in a superhero costume as “Bibleman.” He moved to the Kansas City area in the 1990s, after filming a syndicated fishing show there.

[From People]

I remember him vaguely from the 70s and 80s, but I always used to get him confused with the other blond, curly haired kid who starred in “The Blue Lagoon” with Brooke Shields. I also remember that he could never say the name “Charles” correctly. It always sounded like he was saying “Chorles.” I have no idea how much money he owes on his house, but something tells me that if it’s already in foreclosure, a garage sale probably isn’t going to help much. Maybe he can move in with Gary Coleman or something.

Here’s Willie Aames with his wife in a promotional image for their book. Header is a still from Celebrity Fit Club 6: Boot Camp. Credit: tv.yahoo.com.