The CBS network makes its bread and butter off crime procedurals like CSI, CSI: Miami, CSI: NY, Criminal Minds, NCIS and Numb3rs. This season the network has added two more: The Mentalist and Eleventh Hour.

Variety is reporting that LL Cool J will star in a spin-off of NCIS based in LA.

However, two of the network’s stable of crime shows are facing cancellation, according to Michael Ausiello of Entertainment Weekly.

CBS has alerted execs at Without a Trace and Cold Case that the long-running procedurals are prime candidates for cancellation come May. “They no longer have the type of ratings that justify the massive overhead,” points out an Eye source, who adds that the Trace and Case bean counters are looking for ways to trim costs and avoid getting the ax.

[From Entertainment Weekly, print edition, March 20, 2009 issue]

Ausiello cites multiple sources claiming producers are asking cast members to take pay cuts or forfeit annual raises.

Without a Trace stars Anthony LaPaglia, Poppy Montgomery and Eric Close as members of a New-York based FBI unit dedicated to finding missing persons.

Cold Case features Kathryn Morris and Danny Pino as part of a cold case unit based in Philadelphia.

Even if the actors do accept lower salaries, the shows may still get cut. Cold Case and Without a Trace, like a lot of the cookie-cutter crime dramas, have solid viewer numbers, but not among the much-desired 18-49 demographic.

Without a Trace began in 2002, airing Thursdays after mega-hit CSI, but has since moved time slots several times. Now airing at 10 p.m. on Tuesdays, its ratings have slipped out of the top 20.

Cold Case debuted in 2003. For the week of March 2, 2009, it came in thirteenth place, with 12.62 million viewers.

Reps for CBS and Warner Bros. declined to comment. Uber-mogul Jerry Bruckheimer produces both Cold Case and Without a Trace, along with all of the CSIs and the new show Eleventh Hour.

The problem with these shows is they all blend together. The writers can’t seem to come up with original crimes for the teams to solve, so they try to spice things up by focusing on the characters’ private lives, but that too becomes redundant. There are only so many crises a law-enforcement officer can endure, so the characters end up getting shot and hospitalized, pregnant, addicted to painkillers, or having secret affairs with co-workers — or all of the above.

Another possible solution to raise ratings would be to pull a “Law & Order,” i.e. change up the cast, especially those actors who refuse lower salaries. This can be risky as well, but if it works on CSI, with Laurence Fishburne replacing William Petersen, then Anthony LaPaglia’s Agent Jack Malone may be forced into retirement to make room for Hugo Weaving and Kathryn Morris’s Detective Lily Rush may be killed off in favor of Carrie-Ann Moss.

Hosting the Oscars seems like a great honor that no one would really want, since every host since Billy Crystal has been almost universally panned. Jon Stewart hosted in 2006 and 2008, and the episodes of The Daily Show where the correspondents made fun of his performance were always more funny than Stewart during the ceremony itself. Let’s just not even mention poor David Letterman.

The new Oscars producers threw us for a loop when they bypassed the traditional TV host/stand-up comedians and hired the “Sexiest Man Alive” Hugh Jackman as host.

For those who only recognize Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, he’s not a novice. He hosted the Tony awards from 2003 to 2005, and won an Emmy in 2004. He is quick-witted with improv and knows how to work a room, as he did as Peter Allen in The Boy from Oz.

Plus, he’s really hot. He told Entertainment Weekly he’s not afraid to use his sex appeal if it helps turn the Oscars into a party.

I’m Australian. I think it goes with the citizenship, doesn’t it? When I have a party, the first thing I do is give the guests a shot glass with a little vodka or something. Now, I can’t do that for all 6,000 people at the Kodak Theatre, but I’ll be trying to do it in spirit. It’s going to be a celebration of movies. We’re in the world of showbiz, and the Oscars have to be more show than business.

…Nudity. I’m planning on getting nude for a lot of it….No words, nothing, just me having a shower. That’s also a very Australian thing to do at a party.

[From Entertainment Weekly, print edition, February 6 issue]

With Oscar ratings in decline since Titanic had its banner year, new producers Bill Condon and Laurence Mark appear to be going for a more “That’s Entertainment!” vibe.

Listen, it’s too early to give details, but it’s fair to say there’s going to be singing and dancing. The fact that they’ve hired me is a sign they’re taking a different route. I’m not a stand-up comedian, and that’s generally the way things have gone. But I’ve done some hosting, and I really enjoy it….I do love things going off script. I hope there’ll be some spontaneity. If people know what to expect, then your party’s dead.

[From Entertainment Weekly, print edition, February 6 issue]

Hugh admits the Oscars are too long and promises they’ll be shorter, although he doesn’t say how, considering they’re still handing out 24 awards, including those that few people outside of show business care about, like Art Direction and Sound Mixing.

Hugh confesses that he dreamed of someday hosting the Academy Awards after his Tony gig, but he figured it would be at least another decade before it might happen.

I couldn’t get back to sleep, I was so excited….I told my wife and she was jumping up and down on the bed. The thought of a kid from the northern suburbs of Sydney hosting it, that took a while to sink in.

[From Entertainment Weekly, print edition, February 6 issue]

Hugh is a great talent, Viva Laughlin notwithstanding, so I hope he does well as host. If he flops, then I hope he at least hosts some of the show from the shower.

The Oscars with Hugh Jackman as host will air February 22.

Hugh Jackman is shown out in NY with his son Oscar, 3, daughter Ava, 3 and a half, and his wife of 12 years Deborra-Lee Furness. Credit: Splash News.

Krista Allen is either genuinely in love with George Clooney or the dimmest bulb on the Christmas tree of women Clooney has dated over the years.

Krista and George apparently reconciled (again) last year after Clooney’s breakup with Sarah Larson, but the National Enquirer reports Krista dumped him (again) because, although he’s been sending her hot text messages, she actually hasn’t seen George since November, and even then they didn’t go out.

On Nov. 11, the 47-year-old actor was in Los Angeles to make his latest film and dined with pals in West Hollywood. Then for his nightcap, he went to Krista’s place in Beverly Hills, where he stayed the night, said the insider…. “Krista was furious and raged, ‘What am I — just his friend with benefits?’”

[From National Enquirer, print edition, February 2, 2009]

George also reportedly broke a promise to spend time with Krista and her son at Christmas, then spent New Year’s in Mexico without her.

Krista grew angry after seeing George with swimsuit model Estefania Kuester at a charity event in December and is jealous over George’s relationship with Lost star Rebecca Mader, Clooney’s leading lady in the upcoming film Men Who Stare at Goats.

I can’t imagine the Paris Hilton hook-up rumors helped either.

It’s possible Krista may just enjoy the fame of being linked to Hollywood’s modern-day equivalent of Cary Grant, but the Enquirer says she’s really heartbroken.

Concluded the insider: “George was the love of Krista’s life. She was hoping to walk down the aisle with him — but now she’s given up all hope.”

[From National Enquirer, print edition, February 2, 2009]

It doesn’t appear George is overly upset about being dumped. He will probably spend the rest of his life a happy bachelor, but Krista shouldn’t give up all hope. Even Warren Beatty was eventually brought to heel.

Krista Allen and her son Jake are shown on 11/16/08. Credit: PRPhotos and Fame. George Clooney is shown on 1/26/09. Credit: WENN

Given Angelina Jolie’s wild-child roots, it’s interesting that one of the criticisms she is receiving lately is how bland her style is. She seems to rotate between outfits in solid black or white. Since much of what she’s been wearing is designed by Ralph Lauren, Life & Style Weekly speculates an endorsement deal between Angie and Ralph Lauren may be in the works.

On the Today show October 16, Angelina wore a belted white dress from Ralph Lauren’s spring 2009 collection. Since then, she’s been spotted wearing Lauren at least five times, including at the Kung Fu Panda DVD-release party on November 9 and at the premiere of Gran Torino on December 9.

Angie had an endorsement deal with St. John that ended last year amid rumors she was unhappy with the red-carpet choices they offered her.

Life & Style quotes an insider who says that while Angelina “finds Ralph’s new line classy and elegant,” there is no endorsement deal in the works.

“She’s not paying for the clothes she’s been wearing, and Ralph’s thrilled Angie’s wearing the designs,” says an insider close to the star. “But there’s no contract. Lots of top designers send Angie clothes. She wears what she wants to.”
[From Life & Style, print edition, January 19, 2009]

A representative for Ralph Lauren wouldn’t comment on Angie’s professional relationship with the label. The rep did tell Life & Style that Angelina “really isn’t wearing much color at the moment. She’s been keeping to mostly black and white….She wore a gray sweater of ours [to the Gran Torino premiere], but that’s about it.”

Angie broke her Ralph Lauren trend by wearing a silver gown by designer Atelier Versace to the Golden Globes, and recently paid homage to the big-hair-and-shoulder-pads era of the 80s in a white suit at the Berlin premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

Angelina has said she plans to scale back on her acting commitments, so a new endorsement deal could be a way for her to stay busy, express herself creatively, make some cash and stay in the public eye. It’s doubtful she needs the money, but she may donate it to some of the many charities she’s involved with.

Here are photos of Angelina in Ralph Lauren recently. Credit: WENN, PRPhotos and Fame

Already sick of A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving and Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer? If you’re in the mood for something really really different this holiday season, Entertainment Weekly has listed the 50 Sexiest Movies Ever, and thankfully none of them include Frosty the Snowman.

So, what does EW consider the sexiest movie ever?

1) George Clooney and Jennifer Lopez in Out of Sight

It made Clooney a film star, gave Lopez her most well-rounded role to date, and, thanks to director Steven Soderbergh, features a number of scenes that belong in a Sexy Cinema Hall of Fame.

The first is, of course, the Jenny-and-George-in-the-trunk-of-a-car scene. They spoon with an instant intimacy that surprises both of them (and us) — meeting cute in a unique setting that’s become one of the most erotically charged moments of modern movies. Another comes in a hotel lounge at night. Soderbergh flashes forward from their flirtatious conversation to scenes of the lovemaking that results as soon as they leave the bar: The talk and the act exist simultaneously, voluptuously.

Out of Sight is a crackerjack thriller — but it’s also a cinematic aphrodisiac. It’s downright dangerously sexy.

[Entertainment Weekly, print edition, November 28, 2008]

I saw this film years ago, and it wouldn’t top my list, but it is an example of a good film that actually has plot to go along with the sex scenes.

2) His Girl Friday from 1940, with Cary Grant and Rosalind Russell

Proof you don’t need sex to be sexy.

3) Mr. & Mrs. Smith

The infamous film that brought Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie together, resulting in great chemistry and perfect casting.

4) Body Heat, with Kathleen Turner and William Hurt

Goes without saying.

5) Bull Durham

The film where Kevin Costner was at his sexiest, painting Susan Sarandon’s toenails and honoring “long slow deep soft wet kisses that last three days.”

6) Don’t Look Now

A horror film that includes a sex scene between Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie that is so suggestive it’s still debated whether the two were really going at it.

7) Y Tu Mama Tambien

Amen, Hallelujiah. If you don’t see another movie on this list, see this one. Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna are phenomenal as two teens who set off on a road trip with an older woman and end up in one of the hottest kisses on film.

8. The Last of the Mohicans

I have to disagree with this one, since I didn’t like this movie at all, despite long-haired shirtless Daniel Day-Lewis.

9) A Walk on the Moon

If you don’t get what people see in Viggo Mortensen, rent this movie. Way before Aragorn, he is pure sex as the hippie Blouse Man who shows frustrated wife and mother Diane Lane the pleasures of the flesh. As an added bonus, Liev Schreiber plays the uptight husband.

10) Before Sunset

Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy hook up again in Paris hours before he has to catch a plane.

Read the full list at ew.com.

Hayden Panettiere skyrocketed to fame as the center of the TV show Heroes’ enigmatic tagline “Save the cheerleader, save the world.” Her long blonde hair and blue eyes personified the perfect American girl-next-door - except her character Claire can’t be injured.

Some TV stars have contracts that forbid them from cutting their hair (think David Krumholtz of Numb3rs). Hayden apparently doesn’t have such a contract. Earlier this year, she showed off a new short haircut that accentuates her perfect cheekbones, but is also costing the producers of Heroes a lot of money, according to In Touch.

The 19-year-old debuted a cropped bob back in June, but it clashed with what’s happening on-screen. “They need her to have long hair for her character,” an insider on the set tells In Touch, adding that for continuity, the show has had to dish out lots of cash for hairpieces. “They’re made of real hair so they’re costing at least $6,000 for every fitting.”

[From In Touch, print edition, December 1, 2008]

Heroes’ debut season was phenomenal, but since then the show has been losing viewers due to the addition of too many characters and convoluted plotlines. Two of the show’s producers were recently fired due to “creative differences.”

On the personal front, Hayden and costar Milo Ventimiglia are moving in together, according to Star.

Hayden recently plunked down $2.6 million for a three-bedroom, three-bath house high in the Hollywood Hills and has asked her 12-year-older Heroes costar Milo to be her roomie! “She’s very much in love with him and wants him around all the time,” says an insider. “This way, they can even carpool to the set together.” Even Hayden’s mom, Lesley, has come around to the idea. “She lives down the street from Hayden, so she can keep an eye on her,” adds the insider. “Hayden’s a good kid. She’s not going to do anything wild.”

[From Star, print edition, December 1, 2008]

Hayden seems to be the rare teen star who isn’t always in the tabloids for drugs, partying and dating a new guy every other week. Maybe that maturity will help “Halo” stay a couple, despite the age difference. But I’m cynical, especially when Heroes goes off the air and she remains the more famous of the two. Hollywood is notoriously hard on star couples, even ones angelically nicknamed “Halo.”

Hayden Panettiere is shown premiering her new clutch bag for Dooney & Burke at the Venetian hotel and casino in Las Vegas on 11/22/08. Credit: WENN

As 2008 comes to a close, it’s time for the avalanche of year-end reviews and lists. I’m freaking out over the shrinking number of shopping days until Christmas, and Barbara Walters has already determined who the most fascinating people of the year are.

2008 was pretty un-fascinating, overall. The list is more of an indicator of popular culture than genuine fascinating people.

Some names on the list are obvious, like Olympic record-setter Michael Phelps, failed vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin, Sarah Palin impersonator and Emmy-winner Tina Fey, and tween queen Miley Cyrus.

Two of the names are questionable. Rush Limbaugh was one of the many blowhards commenting on the election, even encouraging people to vote for Hillary Clinton in the primaries in order to beat Barack Obama, but was he the most fascinating? It’s certainly indicative of what a circus the election was when Limbaugh is more of a draw than one of the few legitimate commentators left.

Frank Langella is a name I recognized as an actor, but I had to search IMDB to figure out why he’s on Barbara’s list. I’m still not sure. He’s an Oscar contender for Frost/Nixon, but that film doesn‘t even open until December 5, the day after the show airs.

Two of the names are just plain WTF. Will Smith and Tom Cruise must have the best publicists in the world, to make the list ahead of actors that actually had break-out years, like Robert Downey Jr., Daniel Craig, or Christian Bale. Will Smith’s Hancock is one of the high-grossing films of the year, but was overshadowed by other films. Tom Cruise had a part in Tropic Thunder, but Valkyrie is getting more talk for its delays than the quality of the film itself. In fact, Suri Cruise should have made the list instead of Tom.

The last two names on the list have yet to be released. I’ll go out on a limb and predict Barack and Michelle Obama.

Barbara Walters 10 Most Fascinating People of 2008 will air Thursday, December 4 on ABC.

If I’ve missed any reasons why these people should be considered one of the top 10 fascinating people in the world, please let me know.

Last year’s list included Victoria and David Beckham, Justin Timberlake, the founders of MySpace, Bill Clinton, J.K. Rowling, Katherine Heigl, Jennifer Hudson, Hugo Chavez and Don Imus.

If I may make some suggestions to Barbara: Viggo Mortensen, Jensen Ackles, Gael Garcia Bernal, and the creators of icanhascheezburger.

Reese Witherspoon’s divorce from Ryan Phillippe was both painful and too public for the private actress, but she held her perky pointy chin high and rode out the tabloid storm for the sake of her kids.

Having been burned once, Reese took her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal slowly. The two seem to be compatible and really cute together to boot.

After over a year together, In Touch reports that Reese is finally ready to marry again.

“They laugh at each other’s jokes and they’re both homebodies,” says a friend of the couple. “They have unbelievable chemistry.” Most importantly, her children, Ava, 9, and Deacon, 5, “love him.” On October 23, the couple celebrated Deacon’s birthday at Reese’s Brentwood, Calif., home. “Jake has gotten really close to her kids,” says the friend. “Family is important to him.”

It is to Reese, too. And now the actress wants to make it official and marry Jake. “Reese is not a very spontaneous person,” the pal explains. “So she’s given a lot of thought to whether Jake’s the one for her. And he is.”

Jake brought up marriage a while ago, “but she didn’t want to rush into it,” a source says. Reese, 32, who split with husband Ryan Phillippe, 34, in October 2006, wanted her children to have time to adjust to the divorce. She also needed time to heal. After the split, Reese admitted she was sad: “I’m just sort of living day by day.” But when she started dating Jake in the spring of 2007, he renewed her faith in love.

[From In Touch, print edition, November 10, 2008]

For the wedding, In Touch reports Reese is planning an intimate ceremony of about 25 guests, to take place at the new $6.9 million house Reese bought in Ojai. A local says, “She’s already inquired with town officials about blocking off the street and getting a ban on helicopters if they marry outside.”

Jake may even convert from Judaism to Christianity for Reese.

While she hasn’t set a date, Reese expects the wedding to happen in 2009.

But now there’s a bump in their fairy tale romance.

The National Enquirer reports Jake has told Reese to cancel wedding plans after the sudden divorce of his parents, Naomi Foner and Stephen Gyllenhaal, after 30 years of marriage.

“Jake is devastated by his mom and dad’s split, and it’s soured him completely on marriage,” an insider told The Enquirer. “He can’t believe that after all these years his mom and dad are divorcing. It blindsided him. He’s already asked Reese to cool off on the wedding talk.”

[From National Enquirer, print edition, November 17, 2008]

Even though Jake has moved in with Reese and bonded with her kids, he’s now the one who wants to take things slow.

The actor flew from London where he’s filming Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time to Los Angeles the last weekend in October to tell Oscar winner Reese that he wants to pull the plug on their wedding plans, said the insider.

“It’s too much of a drain for Jake to plan his wedding when he’s mourning his parents’ breakup,” divulged the insider.

“But Reese is already hinting to friends that they were going to throw a lavish ceremony next summer. And while she’s sympathetic to Jake’s heartbreak over his folks, she’s not going to wait forever for him to make a commitment to their future.”

[From National Enquirer, print edition, November 17, 2008]

It sounds like this will be a test of Reese and Jake’s relationship that they’ll hopefully be able to work out. Reese is an admitted Type-A personality, but she should give Jake the time and room he needs to deal with his parents’ divorce, the same time and room he gave her after her divorce.

Reese and Jake are shown out in London on 10/10/08. Credit: Bauergriffinonline. Reese is also shown out in Santa Monica on 10/22/08. Credit: Fame. She looks a lot happier here than we’ve seen her in a while.

Pretty couple Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr share more than photogenic cheekbones and an interest in Buddhism. They both enjoy jewelry, which may soon include an engagement ring for Kerr.

For years, Orlando has worn necklaces with a variety of baubles from all his travels, and in September, Miranda and Orlando spent more than $2,000 at a charity auction of Afghan jewelry.

Now Star reports Orlando is getting possessive about what jewelry Miranda wears.

Orlando Bloom wants supermodel girlfriend to wear his ring. And no one else’s! He’s made Miranda chuck all of the jewelry her exes had given her, a friend reveals. But he didn’t leave her dazzle-free. Miranda was blinging out in bracelets and other baubles from her beau at Primitivo Wine Bistro in Venice, Calif., on October 25. Says a witness, “She said she only wears stuff from Orlando now!”

[From Star, print edition, November 17, 2008]

The couple have been together over a year, and In Touch reports that they’re about to take it to the next level.

“They are talking about settling down and getting married in a year,” a friend of the Victoria’s Secret model tells In Touch. “They have had a bit of a crazy year, but they do love each other and she wants to be his wife.” Miranda, 25, and Orlando, 31, openly showed their affection during a romantic dinner at Primotivo in Venice Beach, Calif., on October 26. “They were holding hands and kissing throughout the meal,” says the friend.

[From In Touch, print edition, November 17, 2008]

In Touch obviously isn’t overly concerned about getting details like the date and spelling of the restaurant right. Pictures show the couple were at the restaurant on October 25, as Star reports, and the name of the restaurant is Primitivo, not Primotivo.

If they do wed, Miranda may be the breadwinner in the family. She is the face of David Jones Limited and will appear at the Victoria’s Secret fashion show in Miami in December.

Orlando has been rumored for several roles, but so far nothing seems to have panned out. Hopefully, Orlando will at least don the blonde wig and pointy ears as Legolas for The Lord of the Rings prequel.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Here are a bunch of photos of Orlando Bloom at the airport on 10/4/08. They include pictures of him lifting up his shirt as he passes through security, which I know Sammie will appreciate. Credit: Bauergriffinonline. Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr are shown at their first public appearance together, at the Australian Derby in Sydney, on 4/26/08. Credit: IKON/Fame Pictures

In the current issue of People, Josh Radnor of How I Met Your Mother hints that he has a new girlfriend. When asked if he is seeing anyone, he doesn’t name names but answers, “I am rounding a corner in the relationship department. I’m in the beginning of something new.”

Us, however, does name names. The November 10 issue reports that Josh’s new girlfriend is Lindsay Price of Lipstick Jungle. They were spotted getting cozy at The Striking Viking Story Pirates concert in New York City on October 4. “They were flirty,” says an onlooker. The two were also spotted the next night at the Ruby Slipper Collection event at Saks.

Like Josh, it sounds like Lindsay is taking things slow. A Price source told Us, “It’s nothing serious.”

Lindsay and Josh first met when she guest-starred on How I Met Your Mother in 2007, which is the same year she split from husband Shawn Piller.

So, does a guy like Josh take a date to a Hollywood hotspot to impress her?

I never enjoyed going to clubs. You can’t hear anything and you can’t talk. What’s the point of being with people?

[From People, print edition, November 17, 2008]

The Striking Viking Pirates, where Josh and Lindsay went for their date, “collect written works from students and youth and adapt these stories for the stage. Kid-written work is then performed by professional actors in a sketch comedy revue,” according to the official site.

Josh describes himself as a laid back guy who meditates twice a day so it’s not surprising that he picked a nontraditional venue for a date with Lindsay.

Photo credit: PRPhotos