In the scope of Marlon Brando’s life, he really only had a brief moment of hotness in the public eye. It lasted roughly a decade, but my God, what a f-cking decade. Everything about him just oozed sex and desire and sensuality and something so wounded and delicate, yet so animal and primal. Too much? Jesus, I love old photos of Marlon Brando. Just empty your mind of every idea you’ve ever had of the modern Brando, the man’s whose bad habits ruined him… and just remember The Hotness. Ladies, Marlon Brando is our headliner Hot Guy. Enjoy.

Do you know how much my white, Southern mother loves Sidney Poitier? She’s been in love with him since she was a little girl, growing up in 1950s Georgia, and as a little girl she would tell people that she was going to marry him some day. As you can imagine, this was frowned upon. But damn, he was so beautiful! I can see her point.

A lot of people think Harrison Ford looked his finest in the Star Wars days. True, Han Solo was a sexy bitch. Who amongst us didn’t moan (with pleasure) a little when Laia tells her nerfherder that she loves her him and he says, “I know”? That was so f-cking badass. But my favorite version of Harrison is from Working Girl. I love him in that era - the late 1980s, early 1990s. That was his heyday, and he was getting a little old for some of this sh-t, but he was still working that boyish handsome thing. Love his crooked smile.

Since you girls seem to be happy with vintage, can I do a vintage dude that I’ve always found incredibly beautiful? I think Sam Cooke might be one of the most beautiful men, with one of the most amazing voices, ever to walk this earth. LOVE.

Are you people into Henry Cavill? I’ve never really noticed him before, but he’s pretty. I’m trying to play it cool, because secretly I want to see what he tastes like. I bet it tastes like cinnamon.

This week was the finale of White Collar’s second season, and I don’t want to spoil it for you, but I’m really, really worried about my favorite character. Fortunately, Matt Bomer’s fine ass is probably going to make it back for a third season - praise Jesus. My taste runs more towards Tom DeKay, but I appreciate Bomer’s loveliness:

Did someone order some Ryan Gosling? I wonder what it would be like to date him? Because he’s boyfriend material, in my opinion. He’s not some hot piece you meet at the bar and f-ck in the bathroom. No, you act like a lady, makeout with him in the bathroom, feel guilty that you didn’t put out, and then pray to God that he calls. And when he does, you’ve got your boyfriend.

Shia LaBeouf isn’t for everybody, but I adore the kid. He has mother issues and he’s a fabulous little con artist, but he also seems like a sweet kid, hyper-aware of being a professional and being good to his fans. Plus, I love his quirky looks. He brings out the cougar in me.

Just a little taste of Jake Gyllenhaal, when he was quite young (but legal!). I call this “The Boyfriend Photo” - Jake looks like he’s been photographed by his girlfriend right after he’s woken up, and he’s all grumpy, but you know he would probably be up for it in a minute.

Dominic West, anyone? The rare dude who shouldn’t have facial hair or scruff. Actually, scratch that… his whole chin area is very weird to me. Don’t get me wrong, I would hit it like it was the Last Dong Ever, but I’m just saying, “weird chin.”

I don’t care for Paul Walker because I used to be in love with a dude who looked so much like him, and the dude was a heartbreaker. Paul is cute, though. He just reminds me of pain, though.

In honor of the U.S. Open, let’s do a couple of hot tennis guys, shall we? Personally, I think Rafa has a rat-face, but I know he has a fanbase, so here you go:

Janko!

James Blake. I think he’s so hot.

Andy Roddick, who I’m kind of “meh” on.

I can’t help it, I love Roger Federer:

Robin Soderling is rather cute too:

I’m not sure who Albert Montanes, but I like that he gets romantic with his racket.

I love that Jesse L. Martin is trying to bring back the jaunty hat. And plus, I want to see him naked… he can keep the hat on though.

I really like Ryan Kwanten now. He’s adorable.

Lenny Kravitz is kind of hot. He’s got a rockin’ bod and he’s talented. Enjoy.

Charlie Hunnam, by request. He’s the kind of guy that I don’t like in photos, but I would be all over him in person. He’s kind of intense too, isn’t he? Like, sexy intense.

So… I watched The Back-Up Plan, and I f-cking hated it. It was a train-wreck. But this Alex O’Loughlin guy is f-cking beautiful.

Ian Somerhalder isn’t my choice. You girls have suggested him time and time again, and I always feel so “meh” about him. Sure, I get why you like him. He’s pretty. But I first saw him in Lost, and while I appreciated the Boone character, I can’t say I really missed him when he was killed off. Ian is not the best actor. At all. And he has freaky eyes. Now, all that being said, I am really, really enjoying the cowboy hat photo.

Eric Stoltz, forever crush. Sweet ginger boy.

I’m really not feeling this Matthew Gray Gubler person. But you request it, and I shall provide it. He looks like his best friend is a needle.

Earlier this week, I did a Hot Guy Wednesday devoted to the men of the GQ UK Man of the Year awards. There were some fine specimens, but there was one dude in particular that seemed to set off the “CODE RED, MUST BONE NOW” alert. His name is David Gandy, and he’s a model, and he’s like an even prettier, buffer, hotter, more luscious version of Matt Bomer. I didn’t recognize him at first with all of his clothes on, but now that I’ve looked him up, I know where I’ve seen him - he’s that fine piece in the Dolce & Gabanna “Light Blue” (or whatever) ads. He’s the hottie laying down in a boat, f-cking you with his eyes. Him. Also: when I was looking up photos of him, I found these NSFW GEMS. Enjoy this sh-t. Because I think this might be perfection.

Oh, Clive. I found your fansite with a well-maintained photo gallery, and I went overboard. I hope you don’t mind. At this point, I think my panties have pretty much vaporized.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Clive Owen’s fansite, Vanity Fair, GQ, Details, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Google Images.

If he was anybody else, I would be telling him to move on. But because it’s Tim Gunn, and because he refuses to stop talking sh-t about Anna Wintour, I want him to keep talking. While Tim promotes his book, he’s been verbally bitch-slapping Anna Wintour - nay, all of Conde Nast - for the past few weeks. He’s been talking sh-t about just about everybody though - but for some reason, it’s the Wintour stuff that gets the most play. Anyway, Page Six caught up with Tim at the Project Runway show yesterday, and he was in good spirits. Probably because he knows Anna doesn’t have the balls of steels it would take to come over and bitch him out in person:

Tim Gunn says he expects “hell to freeze over” if he runs into Anna Wintour this week. The fashion expert writes in his new book that he saw Wintour being carried by bodyguards down the stairs after a 2006 fashion show. Gunn, promoting his book, “Gunn’s Golden Rules,” said Wintour went “ballistic” at his comments.

He told us after the “Project Runway” show, “I wasn’t slinging mud or criticizing her character. More than 30 people must have seen it. I’m just the only one brave enough to tell the truth. Lord knows hell would freeze over if I came face to face with her here, but I probably wouldn’t be able to see past her handlers.”

[From Page Six]

Another beautiful slam - Anna is surrounded by “handlers” - meaning, she’s out of touch, she consciously surrounds herself with sycophants, she’s a f-cking joke. I want to marry Tim.

Page Six had another story about Wintour too - although it started out as a Naomi Campbell story. Earlier this week, there was a big charity event (that CB and I were invited to, alas, we didn’t go!) called Fashion’s Night Out. Wintour is one of the organizers, and designers donate their clothes, models donate their time, and it raises a lot of money for charity. Well, Naomi Campbell was one of the models, and many sources claimed that Naomi was a big, fat pill (shocking). Some claimed that Naomi wouldn’t agree to come unless Wintour put her on an upcoming cover of Vogue (ha). Anyway, Naomi threatened Anna with a phone or something, because Anna released a brisk statement: “Naomi was on time, professional and a joy to work with.” She said, cowering in fear of The Naomi.

Anna in Sept. 2009 & January & March 2010. Credit: WENN.

I knew W Magazine had put Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams - costar in the upcoming Blue Valentine - on the cover of their October issue, but I had no idea it would be this hot. I just… wow. They really have chemistry together, don’t they? Good for Michelle. She strikes me as a wall flower/wilting flower most of the time, but it’s good to see her find some bombshell moves and sex it up.

Regarding their film - I thought it was just a tearjerker romance, but apparently it’s got some kind of edge to it? According to sources, it’s about “David and Cindy, a couple who have been together for several years but who are at an impasse in their relationship. While Cindy has blossomed into a woman with opportunities and options, David is still the same person he was when they met, and he is unable to accept either Cindy’s growth or his lack of it. Innovatively structured, the narrative unfolds in two distinct time frames, juxtaposing scenes of first love and youthful sexuality with those of disenchantment and discord.” Hm…

By the way, just a word about W Magazine - I like that they’re doing more multiple-star covers. Jon Hamm and Rebecca Hall a few months ago, and that weird overly-Photoshopped Gerard Butler and Jennifer Aniston shoot in the Spring. W has a new editor now, but I’m glad to see they’re keeping with this two-star cover thing. It’s nice to see male stars on the cover of a fashion magazine, in a highly stylized editorial.

W Magazine photos courtesy of Hollywood Dame.